Goodbye
Snö
Det snöar. Kommer du ihåg? Det snöade och vi var unga. En park, en parkeringsplats, en gångväg i vintermörkret. Frostnupna kinder och kalla läppar. Blöta halsdukar med sakta tinande flingor. Iskalla händer i varann. Jag glömmer aldrig dina händer. Så stora, så trygga. Du höll mig i dem som det trasiga barn jag var.
Känslan av ditt hår mellan mina fingrar, doften av dig. Att följa din nackgrop med tummen. Det är snart tio år sedan den första snön med dig. Än är lukten av snö stark. Jag älskar dig än. Lev väl. Jag saknar dig.
Panikångest
Otakurama
Missanpassade Maarit gillar
Efter mycket funderande och surfande TROR jag och Ellen att vi fattat vad detta fenomenet "Dark Woods Circus" är. NÅGON gjorde denna underbara låt med programmet Vocaloid som framställer syntetisk röst, och gjorde denna fantastiska video till. Efter det bildades fankulter som gjort egna liknande verk med liknande Vocaloidmusik. Det finns till och med som rollspel nu.
Men denna är bäst. Älskar låten och älskar "rösten" och älskar videon. Teckningsstilen är uuuuunderbar.
........
Nej. Jag fattar inte. Jag fattar ingenting längre. Jag är bara ensam,
Kastade iväg en 21-årig stekare som ville plocka upp mig. Han var till och med söt. Som socker. Trots sin läskiga stil.
För att hjärnan inte vill som jag vill. För att hjärnan såg HONOM på väg ner i stan och sen vägrade glömma.
Jag var inte ens kär. Whats the fucking deal? Eller var jag det? Nä. Men kunde blivit. Det var väl det.
Full är jag. Och suckig. Ja. Suck alltså.
Så tyst. För tyst. Men vad kan jag se fram emot utom tystnad? Jag tror jag dör om jag måste leva i vacuum alltid.
Kvällens favorit var "Jag har tappat mitt nummer. Kan jag få ditt?" Applauds for that one.
Not for the sender though. En läskig hårdrockare a´la åttiotal.
Bara kollar in asiater. Såg två söta på Thaicorner. Varav den ena till och med verkade lägga märke till mig då han sade vad det stod på min arm när den andra frågade.
Men är det lönt? Är ju redan kört i förväg.
Jag ger upp.
Lika bra att resignera och ge upp. Mindre heartbreak så.
Jag har gett upp allt egentligen. Men jag är för feg bara. Kanske för snäll. Vad skulle mamma säga.
Kastade iväg en 21-årig stekare som ville plocka upp mig. Han var till och med söt. Som socker. Trots sin läskiga stil.
För att hjärnan inte vill som jag vill. För att hjärnan såg HONOM på väg ner i stan och sen vägrade glömma.
Jag var inte ens kär. Whats the fucking deal? Eller var jag det? Nä. Men kunde blivit. Det var väl det.
Full är jag. Och suckig. Ja. Suck alltså.
Så tyst. För tyst. Men vad kan jag se fram emot utom tystnad? Jag tror jag dör om jag måste leva i vacuum alltid.
Kvällens favorit var "Jag har tappat mitt nummer. Kan jag få ditt?" Applauds for that one.
Not for the sender though. En läskig hårdrockare a´la åttiotal.
Bara kollar in asiater. Såg två söta på Thaicorner. Varav den ena till och med verkade lägga märke till mig då han sade vad det stod på min arm när den andra frågade.
Men är det lönt? Är ju redan kört i förväg.
Jag ger upp.
Lika bra att resignera och ge upp. Mindre heartbreak så.
Jag har gett upp allt egentligen. Men jag är för feg bara. Kanske för snäll. Vad skulle mamma säga.
GratisBio
Tänk. Om man är arbetslös, lat, sjukskriven, och ändå tillbringar det mesta av sin vakna tid med att maratontitta på animeserier och läsa manga, så kan man lika gärna utnyttja denna uppsjö av meningslös tid till att försöka få ut någonting av det. Då har någon fiffig entreprenörssjälv uppfunnit dessa sajter som baseras på principen - klicka på länkar och få något för det. Sidan får cash för att de ordnar kunder och besök, jag får cash (läs: poäng som växlas in mot varor), företagen som beställt tjänsten får cash för att de får kunder. Tafuckingda! Alla nöjda!
Den som har störst utbud av poänggivande aktiviteter och dessutom snabbt utbetalningssystem är GratisBio.
Samla 400 poäng - få en biobiljett. På några dagar har jag 1, 25 biobiljetter för att vara exakt. Mycket trevligt.
Mindre trevligt är att jag är en så svag människa att jag faktiskt nappat på en hel del av erbjudandena... *Rodna*
Så lättköpt är jag. Vad är väl sinnets cynism och kyla inför möjligheten att låta sig förföras av alla helt fantastiskt oumbärliga saker man kan få och köpa till så fördelaktiga priser...
Den som har störst utbud av poänggivande aktiviteter och dessutom snabbt utbetalningssystem är GratisBio.
Samla 400 poäng - få en biobiljett. På några dagar har jag 1, 25 biobiljetter för att vara exakt. Mycket trevligt.
Mindre trevligt är att jag är en så svag människa att jag faktiskt nappat på en hel del av erbjudandena... *Rodna*
Så lättköpt är jag. Vad är väl sinnets cynism och kyla inför möjligheten att låta sig förföras av alla helt fantastiskt oumbärliga saker man kan få och köpa till så fördelaktiga priser...
Sov gott Ayla
Welcome to the NHK!
Bambi har ett sakralt animeögonblick just nu. Klockan är halv sex på morgonen och jag kan inte sova förrän jag fått ur mig det här. Om ni bara ska se en animeserie i ert liv måste det bli denna.
Jag kan inte med ord beskriva hur underbar den är, den måste ses. Och jag kan inte beskriva vad den handlar om heller.
Lägg de 576 minuterna av ert liv och se denna, speciellt my fellow Hikikomori Isa, och Mariel. Och du också Magnus. Och du också Isabelle. Ni måste. Det är en order från NHK.
Ser fram emot
Imorgon Onsdag, Harry Potter and the halfbloodprince... Kan knappt vänta!
I November.... True Moon, andra delen i Twilight saga...
2010... Min favoritsaga adapterad till liveaction - Alice in wonderland - Checka Cheshirekissen - najs :D
I November.... True Moon, andra delen i Twilight saga...
2010... Min favoritsaga adapterad till liveaction - Alice in wonderland - Checka Cheshirekissen - najs :D
Tick tock
And time goes. On and on. Where to? If anything. What to do? Hesitate. What if... No, I couldn't. But what's the point? I'm missing out. I'm getting older by the minute. Depowered. Fucking fucking fucking ME. Why can't I? Why couldn't I just fight? Why can't I? I want to. But what's the point... Hatehatehatehate. There has to be a way out. There just has to. I can't TAKE this. No meaning, no point. No purpose. Nor intention. Just... Nothingness. Clusters of meaningless things and thoughts and days. Losing all sight and vision. I can't see further anymore. Just the wall of today and a thick mess of tomorrows just like this one was yesterday. And the day before that. Sliding down that path again. So familiar and so detested. Where all trees look the same and no curves exist. That straight narrow road of nothing that slowly eats me, from the inside and outwards. Blackblackblack, I would go if I didn't have that despicable human tendency to hold on and see what's behind the next corner. Maybe... just maybe there could be something there, not reachable yet, but if I could take a couple of steps more, be a little stronger just for a while... Then maybe something is waiting. Just around the corner... Nah. I guess I kind of lost hopes for that. I guess there's just another road. Just like this.
I wish I wasn't in such awe over this crappy existence. Then it would be easy.
Somewhere, I think I'm trying to heal. Trying to mend the broken parts and scotchtape them together. Trying to figure out the purpose of me being here. Trying to make amends with my black soul and guide myself to the strenght I know I have.
But it's so fucking hard. When everythings colourless like a rainy day. I wish I could let myself come to a conclusion at least. To go or stay. Heal or give up. But I'm too attached to let go, and too tired to walk anymore.
Here we go again.
Fjorton
Jag har blivit besatt av både filmen Twilight, böckerna och Robert Pattinson som spelar Edward. :P
Soundtracket går på repeat - det underbara pianostycket "Bella's Lullaby" som Edward i filmen skapar för Bella är bara underbart i nivå med Michael Nymans verk för "Pianot"...
Ignorera irriterande video med fanskit - hittade ingen vettig en. Föredrar den utan arr. med bara piano solo, men hittade ingen som jag tyckte spelade den tillräckligt bra på tuben. Dåliga pianon med kass klang, "pianister" med dålig känsla för takt... usch. Robert Pattinson gör ett bra mycket bättre jobb i filmen. (Ja han spelar själv.)
Vidare tänkte jag redan när jag såg filmen första gången att det var ett par låtar med som sjöngs av någon med en sinnessjukt bra röst - men tänkte inte mer på det. Döm om min förvåning när jag inser att det är pojkspolingens Pattinson egna alster. (Sedan innan filmen). Hans musik verkar inte tankbar någonstans så får väl köpa skiva, för jag måste ha, han passar in perfekt i singersongwriterhyllan precis innan Sexsmith. Men med en röst som inte är av denna värld.... Välbehagsrysning. Vilken äcklig människa. Inte bara är han en duktig skådespelare. Dessutom är han en av de vackraste män som vandrat på jordens yta. OCH är dessutom en talangfull musiker. I hate him. Mostly because I can't have him.
Robert Pattinson: "Let me sign"
Soundtracket går på repeat - det underbara pianostycket "Bella's Lullaby" som Edward i filmen skapar för Bella är bara underbart i nivå med Michael Nymans verk för "Pianot"...
Ignorera irriterande video med fanskit - hittade ingen vettig en. Föredrar den utan arr. med bara piano solo, men hittade ingen som jag tyckte spelade den tillräckligt bra på tuben. Dåliga pianon med kass klang, "pianister" med dålig känsla för takt... usch. Robert Pattinson gör ett bra mycket bättre jobb i filmen. (Ja han spelar själv.)
Vidare tänkte jag redan när jag såg filmen första gången att det var ett par låtar med som sjöngs av någon med en sinnessjukt bra röst - men tänkte inte mer på det. Döm om min förvåning när jag inser att det är pojkspolingens Pattinson egna alster. (Sedan innan filmen). Hans musik verkar inte tankbar någonstans så får väl köpa skiva, för jag måste ha, han passar in perfekt i singersongwriterhyllan precis innan Sexsmith. Men med en röst som inte är av denna värld.... Välbehagsrysning. Vilken äcklig människa. Inte bara är han en duktig skådespelare. Dessutom är han en av de vackraste män som vandrat på jordens yta. OCH är dessutom en talangfull musiker. I hate him. Mostly because I can't have him.
Robert Pattinson: "Let me sign"
Bambikill's Total Asian Boys Love Fest part two point zero
and then it continued. Sunrise, pepsi & more BL.
Boys Love - Theatrical edition (Also called Boys Love 2) ("Boizu Rabu" 2007 by Kotaro Terauchi)
Is the follow up for the success "Boys Love". Or not really, to be precise. It´s kind of weird, because it´s a totally new story and with everything different except for the main actor - Kotani Yoshikazu. In this version, that was made for the big screen directly, in contrary to the first one, that was released directly to DVD, he plays Aoi Kairu, a young teacher, who in his drunkenness caused by being dumped by his girlfriend hooks up with a young male prostitute and spends a night with him. The boy takes his number all tells him he's gonna helt him get over his girlfriend.
One day when the new term starts, Kairu gets a transferstudent in his class, and he is utterly chocked to realize that it's no one less than the boy he spent a night with. Terrified to be exposed, he argues with the boy, named Sora (Kanno Atsugi), but Sora is interested in Kairu, and is not prepared to let him off the hook too easy. Thus starts a weird and twisted relationship between the teacher and his obnoxious student, in the beginning purely that of a blackmailer and his victim, but one that slowly starts to change towards trust, and a growing attraction from Kairus side. It does complicate things even further that Soras roommate Ishiyou falls head over heels in love with Sora, and in his despair gets a hold of discriminating evidence towards the relationship between Kairu and Sora.
This movie is weird in so many ways I don't even know where to begin. The plot is weird, and almost malicious at points. The melodrama is flowing over big time. I don't like the actor who plays Sora (mainly because I'm not very attracted to the feminine type of guys - he looks like a girl with too much makeup in my opinion) and his acting is flawing often, allthough he does make some good interpretations of some scenes. Kotani is great, as he was in the first version, and also Tani Kazunori makes a good job portraying a quite annoying and geeky Ishiyou.
Sexscenes are absent, except for a very confusing and sudden one between Ishiyou and the antagonist of the film - the rich boy Riku. But a quite nice one.
Just one kiss, a very nice one though - between Kairu and Sora, that resolves everything and lets this weird and upsetting movie come to an calm and sweet end. I do like the portrayal of the characters, and also how some scenes are depicting the growth of them emotionally, and the conclusion is that I actually like this movie, it's ok.
But not fantastic in any means. And quite pointless after the beautiful one that is the first. Need to say that it's obvious that I didn't like this as much since I'm not writing a mile about it.
and onto the last movie in this first heat of BAMBIKILLS TOTAL ASIAN BOYS LOVE MARATHON, and the one I loved the most... and of which I could write a ton...
Bangkok Love Story ( "Pêuan ... goo rák meung wâ" / English translation: "Friend... I love you" / by Poj Arnon 2007)
I'm dazed. Mesmerized. And I sincerely do not understand why this movie can have gotten the tiniest bit of bad praise.
I absolutely fucking love it. Everything about it. This little pearl of a Thai movie swept the ground from under my feet and left me in a state of awe and touched, maybe more than I have ever been by any lovestory so far.
This is the weirdest and most bizarre plot I have ever seen in a movie on the topic of love, and the weirdest thing is that I don't mind at all, on the contrary, am so devoured by this movie that I couldn't care less about the BIG FAT CHUNKY MASS of melodrame that it's covered with. It suits it, it gives it even more of the intensity on which it flows. Because the core is so clear - this is a story of love, neverending, unconditional, uncomprehensible. It just is that. Love.
Mekh (Rattaballung Tohssawat) is a hitman, working in Bangkok, the capital of Thailand, and one of the largest cities in the world. He detests his work, but does it, since he has to. He takes care of the shit of other people, and gets payed, and that's all he cares about. He is depressed, misanthropic, indifferent, and the only thing he treasures is his mother and younger brother, for whos survival he is doing what he does. They have AIDS, and are unable to work and make a living for themselves, so Mekh does what he has to. The story begins with his new assignment, he is to track down and deliver alive, a man named It. (Chaiwat Tongsang).
When he brings It to the one who ordered the hit, a fight arouses, and Mekh realizes that the guy he just delivered is not the criminal, but is targeted for knowing too much about the business of the people who wanted him dead. Mekh has some moral to him, and refuses to finish the job. With thus, a gunfight breaks loose, and Mekh gets hit in the arm. Still handcuffed to It, they are forced to escape together, and end up in the outskirts of town. Mekh lets It loose and tells him to leave, or he will kill him, but collapses due to his injury, and has to accept the help of It, who in his awe over the mercy shown upon him by Mekh, is thankful, and sincerely worried over It's life.
Mekh directs It to take him to a hideout where he has been living, and there he gets help from It to remove the bullet and bandage his wound. Mekh passes out, and sleeps for days. When he wakes up, It is still there, tending for him, caring for him, and keeping watch. They fight over this, but Mekh is forced to accept It's help, since he would be lost otherwise.
The two men spend the long time of Mekhs recovery living in the small, abandoned little dump, It nevertiringly nursing Mekh, and gradually they form a bond of mutual trust, understanding and intimacy that noone of them has ever known yet.
And the most beautiful lovestory I've probably ever seen takes it course.
The atmosphere of Bangkok is portrayed in a way that lets one feel the sweltering heat, the humidness, the neverfading pulse of the city, and it's many facettes and sides, most importantly the ones not so often shown - the poor ones, the slums of this great big melting pot of people. I have been to Bangkok, and I could almost feel the smog, the smell of the air and the food cooking in every streetcorner again. The photo is exquisite, with a soft sepiatone to it, giving it a feeling that's hard to describe. Beautiful shots, editing, and almost lyrical angles and scenes just make it even more of a feast for the eye. Even if some scenes are so obviously cliché, it doesn't matter - they're so beautiful so one can just not like them anyway.
The acting is PHE-NO-ME-NAL. Tohssawat (Mekh) does a fantastic portrayal of a vulnerable man in a tough shell, and his acting gave me goosebumps in some scenes. He's so sincere, so naked in his acting, and I was utterly impressed.
I don't know how experienced of an actor he is - but if he is a beginner, and if he isn't gay IRL, then I can only bow.
That puppylook of his could melt the hardest of hearts, I'm sure.
Tongsang, who plays It, makes as good of a job - he brings this empathetic, loving person to life in a way that few actors can. Their interaction is ALWAYS believable, their chemistry radioactive. The complement eachother both as characters and actors in a way that's extraordinary according to me.
Other roles I can hardly remember, these two main protagonists makes one forget everything around, in both the movie and life. The dialogue could probably be called naive and banal, and even sappy - but at least to me - that thought doesn't cross my mind once. I can only focus on the fact that they achieve to sound like they mean every word they say, then be however corny. For actors not as good as these, maybe the VERY emotional dialogue would be hard to pull of credible, but these two diamonds do it every step of the way.
Some scenes are absolutely unforgettable - something like the scene with the moped from Roy Anderssons "A lovestory". The one when It desperately pursuits Mekh through the appartmentcomplex, and speaks to him through the glass made the hairs stand on my arms. (See pic above besides). Also the lovescene in the rain on the street.
And the scene when It washes Mekh when he is ill. And the scene when It comes looking for Mekh and screams in anguish after him when he won't come and keeps hiding. And... you get my point.
It's neverending hope in that Mekh will love him, and his faithfullness and devotion makes me love him.
Mekhs vulnerability and tragic story makes me want to hug him.
The lovescenes are desperate, clumsy, hungry - and so realistic that it feels like I'm almost embarrassed, like peeking at my neighbours or something.
Again, the thought that those two are not attracted to eachother would not cross my mind. And THATS hard for two male heterosexual actors to impersonate in a good style, god knows. I'm curious to if they are straight or not IRL actually.
Not very explicit though, in terms of R-rating. On the contrary. But HOT. Hotter than anything I think I've seen for a while.
This movie could leave one really confused in what to think about it, which I could imagine is the reason for that it's not approved by all critics. The drama is so overkill and intense that it could be hilariously dorky if not saved by the feeling that all is allright and just as it should be. The two main actors carry this whole movie on their extreme charisma and relationship, and everything makes sense, be however crazy it might. I choose to see the plot as a dark saga, does it have to be so fucking realistic always? Head over heels action doesn't usually mix well with love, but here it does. Since the love is the main thing.
All the action and drama around is just accessories to tell the story of these two men and their love for eachother.
As It says himself: "I love you. I don't know why, and it is hard for me to love you. Does love have to have a reason? I just love you". And I believe him.
Boys love marathon
For once I think I´ll write this post in english, as the topic might be of considerable interest for other faghag-otakus desperately and utterly in love with boys who love boys, especially in the forum manga and anime. Think I might even keep all the posts on the subject in english, it depends. Well. Long story short - poor little ol me was completely ignorant to the fact that there actually existed BL- Live action movies! :O You say. Well. I actually thought the market wasn´t really that welcoming of something still so controversial. An occasional gay love movie does hit the cinemas now and then (and of course I DEVOUR them all) but that it actually had been done several productions on popular BL mangas, that had passed me by. Well - yesterday I was enlightened... Moahahahaha.
I PRESENT : BAMBIKILLS TOTAL ASIAN BOYS LOVE FEST!
Ta-fucking-daa :)
Since I am this utterly selfobsessed person who values my own opinions highly (and truthfully mostly because I want someone, ANYONE (!!!!) in my cirkle of acquaintances to recognize and share my passion so I could have someone to chatter away with about stuff that... hrm... To say the least, most people does not understand my view...) I will review them ALL as I go along... hehe. Please bear with me - I promise - I´m a killer writer. And some of them were AWESOME. Must see.
I started out light with the first movie I heard of, since I particularly was looking for that one when I stumbled upon the others - japanese Live action adaption of very popular BL manga "Takumi-Kun series" - a publishing manga about the relationship between two highschoolboys on a private academy in the japanese mountains. (Cliché? Hehe. That´s BL for you usually - and I love it!)
"Soshite harukaze ni sasayaite" (2007 by Yokoyama Kazuhiro, "And whispering in the spring breeze")
is a sugarsweet lightweight movie in all ways - a classic Shonen Ai (means just that: Boys Love) of the fluffier kind - Shojo (girls manga) with the two maincharacters being gay. Boys are pretty, colours bright, acting so-so due to inexperienced actors and low budget, and lovescenes are few and innocent - except for the (seems obligatory in the movies I´ve seen) fairly (pun intended lol) nude and cuddly-cosy "sex-scene" in the end. Plotwise this is based on the first two volumes of the manga - but it´s not that much of a story actually, and doesn´t need to be. (Boy Takumi starts at new school, boy Takumi meets other boy Gii, some complications arise on the way. But of course Takumi and Gii get eachother. And that wasn´t a spoiler - that was a fact one should be able to understand allready by now.)
Well, if I think about it, actually it happens TOO much in the movie! haha
If one hasn´t read the manga it might be a little bit hard to follow, and besides one might think that a LITTLE too much is cramped up in these humble 73 minutes... And that´s true - many of the small sidestories portrayed are extremely unnecessary, and takes focus of the relationship between the main characters. But it´s bearable, allthough some of the guys (almost all to be completely honest - haha) show some considerable lack of acting experience... But it´s ok :) It was the first movie for many of them, budget was low, and they tried their best :) They´re cute anyway.
This manga and movie are actually quite refreshing in my opinion, this due to the fact that the story isn´t traditional in all ways. Firstly - one of the main characters has quite an chocking past to be a fairly innocent Shonen Ai. Second - the way in which the boys actually grasp and accept them being homosexual without any angst or selfdisgust is nice to see. Maybe not THAT believable - but nice. (That the prevalence gay boys is THAT high in an average highschool... THAT I also have a little bit hard to believe - all boys school or not... Not ALL pretty boys are gay.) But a happy and cheerful little story is definitely out of the ordinary in all the heartbreaking tales that are so common in the genre.
I do like the manga better, but I still think the tenderness of it is traceable in the movie as well.
When coming to the good parts...if one is not used to the very careful and subtle cinematic/animatic/whatever actually, language used in asia one might be quite outweirded by the almost metaphorical way the subjects that are somewhat controversial are approached. Ok, this scene is not THAT good of an example, I was mostly spacing out now and reflecting over the way one gets used to the language of anime and manga and interprets stuff that a "non-believer" would never grasp. The nuances is somethin that comes with reading and watching a lot of it.
And in the beginning it takes a little while taking used to the way of expressing things. Well - enough spacing out then - the subject of young guys jumping into bed with another - in love or not - is probably still quite a delicate matter to show on film, and for the movie to be approved - by both censorship, a broader audience than the hardcore yaoigirls, and media, I suspect that the visual stuff need to get cut down a little bit at least. But still - the scenes are tastefully done considering they´re so extremely "shy". The kisses are shot from behind so nothing can be seen, bodies are mostly covered in white sheets and sheer light, and even if one gets a little disappointed in not seeing too much action between these two insanely sweet boys, both the scene and the movie are still satisfactory in the sense that they leave a warm and fuzzy feeling inside, one can´t get other than happy by seeing sincere, mushy, romantic stuff like this :)
So I would definitely recommend, just maybe not if you´re in the mood to see som hardcore stuff....
Then, somewhere around midnight I took on the next one - this time a little heavier stuff, that I read a little about before I saw it, and got good vibes.
BOYS LOVE ( "Boizu Rabu" 2006 by Kotaru Terauchi)
Is a movie I both enjoyed and emphatized with very much. An early, but pretty explicit movie of the genre, and I would say a must, not only for yaoigirls but also for anyone who would be able to grasp and appreciate the concept of not so simple love. Taishin (Kotani Yoshikazu) is a young journalist, working for a small tabloidpressmagazine, and is assigned to do a piece on young model Noerus ( Saito Takumi) artistic sidework as an illustrator. And here starts the tumbling, chaotic and painful lovestory. Noerus emotional unbalance, strong attraction to Taishin - allthough he leeds a to say the least destructive lifestyle with various partners and constant depression, his mean and cunning ways and arrogant attitude gives a multilayered portrayal of a very much tormented young boy. Taishins restricted, uptight person and fear of the fact that he has feelings for another man, a young boy nontheless is acted out flawlessly by Kotani, who I think lifts this movie from mediocre to very seeworthy. His acting is so sincere that I sometimes even can´t say he´s acting at all, especially I can feel, truly feel, his angst over having to realize things about himself that he doesn´t want to.
The plot develops to a heartbreaking lovetriangle between Taishin, Noeru and Noerus best friend Chidori, who has been in love with Noeru since always. Much drama occurs - definitely too much in western measures, but after one gets used to the asian way of often putting in extreme amounts of melodramatic stuff, it doesn´t bother one. The keepsake of this movie is the acting of the two maincharacters, the´re developing relationship, and the tender way in which their saga is told. The end is absurd to be honest, but still so heartbreaking so I caught myself crying.
There are of course some stuff with the movie than are not so fantastic - for one - the awful drawings and art done by Noeru. I can only interpret this as that the director is trying to say something (which I don´t understand to be honest, maybe that Noeru is extremely naive?), because they s-t-i-n-k. That´s not important at all, but bugged me enormously.
Then I got a little annoyed on the overdrama. This could have been SUCH a FANTASTIC movie if the director would have settled for less is more. As now, it becomes a somewhat mediocre movie with fantastic little details and parts.
But don´t get me wrong, I do love it. A lot. And I have a feeling this one will top my chart for wishlists for my birthday...
The sexscenes are extremely good, I feel. Not too showy - scaring away sensitive watchers, and not too lame for a movie with this amount of angst and emotion. The scene where Noeru forcefully practices oral on Taishin in a restroombooth was actually not very graphic at all, but I feel portrayed in an extremely good way - you´ll see what I mean. The sight of their feet tangled up in another - a pair of businessmans shiny leathershoes and a pair of dirty converse, and their absolute silence due to the fact that they are not alone in the restroom, is far more sexy than showing more vulgar stuff.
Noerus absolute arrogance in letting Taishin (and others) see him in intimate situations (allthough they´re not so intimate but actually more sad and abusive), and throwing himself at Taishin completely nude, is quite chocking actually - I thought that would have been stopped. But - this movie was released straight on DVD... But when it became immensely popular, it was remade for the big screen (thus resulting in Boys Love 2 which I will come to later).
And in THAT version, the sexpart is NOT very present.
But well. This isn´t so much about sex. This is a lovestory. And a heartbreaking one it is.
Next - moving on, moving on, now I think it was around 1:30-2:00 am...
Ai no Kotodama ("Words of Devotion", by Kei Kaneda 2008)
Is a whole other type of movie, that just leaves you with a wonderful feeling of warmth and pink cottoncandy, and I kind of needed that after the depressive mood I got into by the last one. The movie is a liveaction, adapted from a popular oneshot Yaoi manga with the same name. The manga isn´t either as good or interesting as the movie though.
Shinya ( Hidenori Tokuyama - famous J-pop singer) and Miyako (Saito Yasuka) are best friends ever since childhood, and since two years back also are living together. They study at the same university, and are always together. On the outside they are just the best of friends, but in private, their relationship is a little more complicated. The are sort of together... In the latest, they have started to argue about trivial stuff more and more, and even more pressure adds when a mutual highschoolfriend, Yuki, enters the picture again, and appears that she has a crush on Miyako. Shiniya gets grumpy and arguments follow another, and suddenly Miyako seems to be more interested in hanging out with Yuki than with Shinya...
It even sounds quite fluffy and innocent. And it is. Incredibly refreshing in more than one way, just because it´s such a sweet little story with hardly any angst, no terrible/sad/depressing plot, but just depicting normal everyday life for a couple and how it can be tricky to figure out sometimes how to move on and resolve things. It´s not usual for BL to tell the stories of the allready formed couples (allthough this couple still had a little bit to go until they had established truly what they meant for eachother.)
Acting is nice, allthough a tiny wee bit overplayed sometimes, but that´s ok, almost all asian actors tend to overact, at least according to our western ideals, I guess it´s a cultural difference, since japanese is a language that is more dependant on emotional distress to bring out some lingual points. I´m used to the overacting so it takes a LOT for me to react, just warning them who might not be used to it. I especially like Hidenori - he´s a natural talent I feel.
And the couples interaction with eachother is fantastic - it´s TOTALLY believable that they love eachother, I have a hard time imagining that those two guys are estranged for the idea of homosexual relationships in real life....
They are so sweet and tender in their bodylanguage towards eachother that one easily is convinced of their characters.
The movie is no fantastic thoughtraising piece of art - absolutely not. It´s a lightweighter, made as an entertaining fanservice mostly. Lots of bare cheasts, lots of kisses and NAWWW-moments. And a looooong lovescene of the same kind as in "Soshite harukaze ni sasayaite" - cuddling and kissing and caressing and on and on and on for so long that it ALMOST becomes boring (!) But extremely sweet, extremely tender, extremely believable and well... Nice to see :)
But not exactly hot. Since it´s too loving...? That may sound weird but... well... what the hell.
This is a sweet little bagatelle that makes a good watch for the short 78 minutes it lasts. It makes one feel happy and very kawaiish.
If not only for other reasons, then to at least watch Hidenori Tokuyama.... heh.
End of act 1 of the Grand BL fest!
I PRESENT : BAMBIKILLS TOTAL ASIAN BOYS LOVE FEST!
Ta-fucking-daa :)
Since I am this utterly selfobsessed person who values my own opinions highly (and truthfully mostly because I want someone, ANYONE (!!!!) in my cirkle of acquaintances to recognize and share my passion so I could have someone to chatter away with about stuff that... hrm... To say the least, most people does not understand my view...) I will review them ALL as I go along... hehe. Please bear with me - I promise - I´m a killer writer. And some of them were AWESOME. Must see.
I started out light with the first movie I heard of, since I particularly was looking for that one when I stumbled upon the others - japanese Live action adaption of very popular BL manga "Takumi-Kun series" - a publishing manga about the relationship between two highschoolboys on a private academy in the japanese mountains. (Cliché? Hehe. That´s BL for you usually - and I love it!)
"Soshite harukaze ni sasayaite" (2007 by Yokoyama Kazuhiro, "And whispering in the spring breeze")
is a sugarsweet lightweight movie in all ways - a classic Shonen Ai (means just that: Boys Love) of the fluffier kind - Shojo (girls manga) with the two maincharacters being gay. Boys are pretty, colours bright, acting so-so due to inexperienced actors and low budget, and lovescenes are few and innocent - except for the (seems obligatory in the movies I´ve seen) fairly (pun intended lol) nude and cuddly-cosy "sex-scene" in the end. Plotwise this is based on the first two volumes of the manga - but it´s not that much of a story actually, and doesn´t need to be. (Boy Takumi starts at new school, boy Takumi meets other boy Gii, some complications arise on the way. But of course Takumi and Gii get eachother. And that wasn´t a spoiler - that was a fact one should be able to understand allready by now.)
Well, if I think about it, actually it happens TOO much in the movie! haha
If one hasn´t read the manga it might be a little bit hard to follow, and besides one might think that a LITTLE too much is cramped up in these humble 73 minutes... And that´s true - many of the small sidestories portrayed are extremely unnecessary, and takes focus of the relationship between the main characters. But it´s bearable, allthough some of the guys (almost all to be completely honest - haha) show some considerable lack of acting experience... But it´s ok :) It was the first movie for many of them, budget was low, and they tried their best :) They´re cute anyway.
This manga and movie are actually quite refreshing in my opinion, this due to the fact that the story isn´t traditional in all ways. Firstly - one of the main characters has quite an chocking past to be a fairly innocent Shonen Ai. Second - the way in which the boys actually grasp and accept them being homosexual without any angst or selfdisgust is nice to see. Maybe not THAT believable - but nice. (That the prevalence gay boys is THAT high in an average highschool... THAT I also have a little bit hard to believe - all boys school or not... Not ALL pretty boys are gay.) But a happy and cheerful little story is definitely out of the ordinary in all the heartbreaking tales that are so common in the genre.
I do like the manga better, but I still think the tenderness of it is traceable in the movie as well.
When coming to the good parts...if one is not used to the very careful and subtle cinematic/animatic/whatever actually, language used in asia one might be quite outweirded by the almost metaphorical way the subjects that are somewhat controversial are approached. Ok, this scene is not THAT good of an example, I was mostly spacing out now and reflecting over the way one gets used to the language of anime and manga and interprets stuff that a "non-believer" would never grasp. The nuances is somethin that comes with reading and watching a lot of it.
And in the beginning it takes a little while taking used to the way of expressing things. Well - enough spacing out then - the subject of young guys jumping into bed with another - in love or not - is probably still quite a delicate matter to show on film, and for the movie to be approved - by both censorship, a broader audience than the hardcore yaoigirls, and media, I suspect that the visual stuff need to get cut down a little bit at least. But still - the scenes are tastefully done considering they´re so extremely "shy". The kisses are shot from behind so nothing can be seen, bodies are mostly covered in white sheets and sheer light, and even if one gets a little disappointed in not seeing too much action between these two insanely sweet boys, both the scene and the movie are still satisfactory in the sense that they leave a warm and fuzzy feeling inside, one can´t get other than happy by seeing sincere, mushy, romantic stuff like this :)
So I would definitely recommend, just maybe not if you´re in the mood to see som hardcore stuff....
Then, somewhere around midnight I took on the next one - this time a little heavier stuff, that I read a little about before I saw it, and got good vibes.
BOYS LOVE ( "Boizu Rabu" 2006 by Kotaru Terauchi)
Is a movie I both enjoyed and emphatized with very much. An early, but pretty explicit movie of the genre, and I would say a must, not only for yaoigirls but also for anyone who would be able to grasp and appreciate the concept of not so simple love. Taishin (Kotani Yoshikazu) is a young journalist, working for a small tabloidpressmagazine, and is assigned to do a piece on young model Noerus ( Saito Takumi) artistic sidework as an illustrator. And here starts the tumbling, chaotic and painful lovestory. Noerus emotional unbalance, strong attraction to Taishin - allthough he leeds a to say the least destructive lifestyle with various partners and constant depression, his mean and cunning ways and arrogant attitude gives a multilayered portrayal of a very much tormented young boy. Taishins restricted, uptight person and fear of the fact that he has feelings for another man, a young boy nontheless is acted out flawlessly by Kotani, who I think lifts this movie from mediocre to very seeworthy. His acting is so sincere that I sometimes even can´t say he´s acting at all, especially I can feel, truly feel, his angst over having to realize things about himself that he doesn´t want to.
The plot develops to a heartbreaking lovetriangle between Taishin, Noeru and Noerus best friend Chidori, who has been in love with Noeru since always. Much drama occurs - definitely too much in western measures, but after one gets used to the asian way of often putting in extreme amounts of melodramatic stuff, it doesn´t bother one. The keepsake of this movie is the acting of the two maincharacters, the´re developing relationship, and the tender way in which their saga is told. The end is absurd to be honest, but still so heartbreaking so I caught myself crying.
There are of course some stuff with the movie than are not so fantastic - for one - the awful drawings and art done by Noeru. I can only interpret this as that the director is trying to say something (which I don´t understand to be honest, maybe that Noeru is extremely naive?), because they s-t-i-n-k. That´s not important at all, but bugged me enormously.
Then I got a little annoyed on the overdrama. This could have been SUCH a FANTASTIC movie if the director would have settled for less is more. As now, it becomes a somewhat mediocre movie with fantastic little details and parts.
But don´t get me wrong, I do love it. A lot. And I have a feeling this one will top my chart for wishlists for my birthday...
The sexscenes are extremely good, I feel. Not too showy - scaring away sensitive watchers, and not too lame for a movie with this amount of angst and emotion. The scene where Noeru forcefully practices oral on Taishin in a restroombooth was actually not very graphic at all, but I feel portrayed in an extremely good way - you´ll see what I mean. The sight of their feet tangled up in another - a pair of businessmans shiny leathershoes and a pair of dirty converse, and their absolute silence due to the fact that they are not alone in the restroom, is far more sexy than showing more vulgar stuff.
Noerus absolute arrogance in letting Taishin (and others) see him in intimate situations (allthough they´re not so intimate but actually more sad and abusive), and throwing himself at Taishin completely nude, is quite chocking actually - I thought that would have been stopped. But - this movie was released straight on DVD... But when it became immensely popular, it was remade for the big screen (thus resulting in Boys Love 2 which I will come to later).
And in THAT version, the sexpart is NOT very present.
But well. This isn´t so much about sex. This is a lovestory. And a heartbreaking one it is.
Next - moving on, moving on, now I think it was around 1:30-2:00 am...
Ai no Kotodama ("Words of Devotion", by Kei Kaneda 2008)
Is a whole other type of movie, that just leaves you with a wonderful feeling of warmth and pink cottoncandy, and I kind of needed that after the depressive mood I got into by the last one. The movie is a liveaction, adapted from a popular oneshot Yaoi manga with the same name. The manga isn´t either as good or interesting as the movie though.
Shinya ( Hidenori Tokuyama - famous J-pop singer) and Miyako (Saito Yasuka) are best friends ever since childhood, and since two years back also are living together. They study at the same university, and are always together. On the outside they are just the best of friends, but in private, their relationship is a little more complicated. The are sort of together... In the latest, they have started to argue about trivial stuff more and more, and even more pressure adds when a mutual highschoolfriend, Yuki, enters the picture again, and appears that she has a crush on Miyako. Shiniya gets grumpy and arguments follow another, and suddenly Miyako seems to be more interested in hanging out with Yuki than with Shinya...
It even sounds quite fluffy and innocent. And it is. Incredibly refreshing in more than one way, just because it´s such a sweet little story with hardly any angst, no terrible/sad/depressing plot, but just depicting normal everyday life for a couple and how it can be tricky to figure out sometimes how to move on and resolve things. It´s not usual for BL to tell the stories of the allready formed couples (allthough this couple still had a little bit to go until they had established truly what they meant for eachother.)
Acting is nice, allthough a tiny wee bit overplayed sometimes, but that´s ok, almost all asian actors tend to overact, at least according to our western ideals, I guess it´s a cultural difference, since japanese is a language that is more dependant on emotional distress to bring out some lingual points. I´m used to the overacting so it takes a LOT for me to react, just warning them who might not be used to it. I especially like Hidenori - he´s a natural talent I feel.
And the couples interaction with eachother is fantastic - it´s TOTALLY believable that they love eachother, I have a hard time imagining that those two guys are estranged for the idea of homosexual relationships in real life....
They are so sweet and tender in their bodylanguage towards eachother that one easily is convinced of their characters.
The movie is no fantastic thoughtraising piece of art - absolutely not. It´s a lightweighter, made as an entertaining fanservice mostly. Lots of bare cheasts, lots of kisses and NAWWW-moments. And a looooong lovescene of the same kind as in "Soshite harukaze ni sasayaite" - cuddling and kissing and caressing and on and on and on for so long that it ALMOST becomes boring (!) But extremely sweet, extremely tender, extremely believable and well... Nice to see :)
But not exactly hot. Since it´s too loving...? That may sound weird but... well... what the hell.
This is a sweet little bagatelle that makes a good watch for the short 78 minutes it lasts. It makes one feel happy and very kawaiish.
If not only for other reasons, then to at least watch Hidenori Tokuyama.... heh.
End of act 1 of the Grand BL fest!
Nosebleed! Fuckin' nosebleed!
Skakar nästan här av extas - jag insåg att min villfarelse att live action adaptioner av manga och anime-BLfilmer (Boys Love/Yaoi/Shonen Ai) inte är så tabu som jag trott. Det finns en uppsjö! Veohplayern är installerad, sitter som en salig faghag på julafton som fått två bögar i ett paket och tindrar med ögonen och väntar på att få igång "Soshite harukaze ni sasayaite".
Jag kan måhända dö av lycka.
Och om du inte fattar näsblodsgrejen behöver du läsa lite manga.